(Source: movingquickly, via ourmarilynmonroe)
I’m just gunna be fat forever.
All the dieting and exercise I’ve been doing has done nothing. I don’t even wanna go on holiday anymore. I’m such a fat cunt. Ugh. Hate everything.
The red washing
down the bathtub
can’t change the colour of the sea
at all.
the last part is perfect.
(Source: caattnip, via oktimeforplanb)
The more I think about it, the more I realise that although more or less losing the interest of my supposed best friend hasn’t really bothered me, it has. And there isn’t anything that can be done. It’s all unspoken about even though it’s obvious we have drifted apart. And it really bloody hurts. I can’t speak out in the worry of causing drama, but most of all hearing her actually say that she doesn’t like me that much anymore or imagining her read this out and laughing… I can’t decide if id rather carry on pretending or if I want to hear it so I can deal with the reality. Either way I guess by posting this I am speaking out just in the pussy way of doing it. Or if it’s all because of me or something I’ve done. Or if I’m just being over dramatic. Everything I say or do seems to just get awkward or negative reactions. I’m sick of just hearing shit through the grape vine and feeling bad and like I’m trying to play the victim when I’m really not. Why all this ugh. I just want my best friend back. Not my pretend to everyone and each other best friend, my real best friend. But then I think if it was meant to last, we both would have made the effort. Blah. Why can’t I be a boy.
